Why are younger disabled people treated different to the elderly?

Im a 40 year old mother of two wonderful daughters i was registared disabled in 2004 since then my daughters have been my carers they do not moan about it they just say "mummy you need to rest we will do it " i have no family who can be bothered to help all to far up their own bottoms .
I an unable to get any help with simple house work i can only go food shopping when my girls are with me and when i drive in to a diabled parking bay i have had so many elderly person telling me you are not allowed to park there you are using someelses blue badge .Why is it if you are diabled and between the ages of 25 and 55 your children are supposed to care for you mine are only 12 and 14 i walk with a stick yes i do not look the norm i like to look nice and well turned out and put my make up on to make myself look good,the fact that i am on over 30 pain killers a day does not mean that i am not in pain 24/7 but i keep smiling and nobody never knows how bad i am .thank you in advance xflickx

I was in very much the same situation as a kid. My mum was struck down with MS (wheelchair bound) when I was 12 (I was the oldest of 4 boys). My mum was 33, my dad worked nights. Unfortunately that is the situation. We were given a choice: My dad could give up work to look after us all sell the house and move somewhere we didn't want to go and claim benefits ; we could go into care, my mum go into a "home" and my dad be left alone; or we struggled like you are doing now. The rest of my family were very much like yours (bugger all use to anyone)

So we all stayed put, I helped my mum to and from bed at night as well as school and a part time job on a market stall. My dad did the laundry and shopping. We had a home help in twice a week (that had to be paid for out of my mums disability benefits) who did ironing and washed the kitchen floor. She couldn't hoover or anything because my dad was in bed. My mum had to be bed bathed or carried/pushed up stairs for a bath.

And that was our existence for 12 years. My mum died age 44.

I know what this situation's like and those girls of yours are 2 in 2 million (BIG UP THE GIRLS, KEEP STRONG!). They had a bit of an advantage over me in that you actually want to live a life (my mum didn't), please carry on making the effort for those girls (with the make up and doing what you can), they appreciate it. And I'm afraid Im left with no other advice to give you other than try contacting your social services to see if they'll give you a subsidised home help.

The blue badge and the parking bay are just people being ignorant. If they read their stuff that came with their blue badge they would know that you don't even have to be disabled to use one, you just have to be using it for the benefit of someone who is disabled.

Why are the young treated differently? Social services etc make better provision for the elderly.

Keep the pain killer situation under review, they're not doing your liver any good. Take care x.

if anybody how answered this question wants to keep in contact please check out my profile and email me would love to hear from you thank you all best wishes keep smiling xxflickxx Report It

I think this may be because you must appear to be fit and healthy in their eyes. You could think of it as a complement that they think you look good (well a back-handed compliment anyway).

People will always complain if they think you are cheating the system, probably in most cases because they wanted that parking space.

--I can relate to you because I have gone through similar but not as unkind as your situation.

--People like to be self-righteous no matter if it be religious, or what-ever
--Judgemental people know more than you, your doctors, and even those like your helpful children--AS TO how serious your condition is!

--When you try to explain, the physical, mental, emotional anguish you have --they do not listen!
--Best thing to do is stop trying to explain, if you are still doing so.
--Keep smiling, and relying on God in prayer!
--Be happy for the assurance of your children. And let their kind words sooth you!

--I have been struggling with a serious disabiity that is not visible, and legally disabled for 15 or more years & am 63.
--I have had attitudes of judgements really deminish my dignity. But my reliance on God first and the help of an excellent wife for many years to be very soothing.
--With a chemical imbalance, I am very sensitive to attitudes, and at times do worse on myself by the struggle with negative experiences that haunt me.
--Its like post-tramatic syndrome without war experiences!--And indeed are disabling along with extreme fatigue experiences every hour of the day.

Unfortunately there are a lot of people in the world that do take advantage of the situation. I rent apartments and many times I have gotten people with state assistance. Most claim to be disabled, but are really playing on a little problem that many others could still work a regular job with.... anyway, my point is that in your case you are paying for everyone that takes advantage of the system.... sad, but true.

The same goes for honest people, in many situations that I have been honest it usually works to my disadvantage.... I guess it's just hard to be a good person now days. :)

Hi, I am a widower and registered disabled (registered 2 years ago) when my wife died unexpectedly last August I really thought my world had ended.
To keep this short in October of last year I was asked if I could do some voluntary work at my local Shopmobility ( we provide electric scooters and wheelchairs) This service really is a lifeline for so many people and working there has been of immense help to me. I know this is not really answering you, but your question really hit me. There will be a local branch of Shopmobility near you, if you can't find it your local council will know. Give it a try you'll find people with similar problems and the indepence you gain from being able to enjoy unaided freedom of movement will be a big help. Good luck