Is this harassment?

I care for an Elderly Lady in her home. She has a hospice nurse (male) that comes to her home twice aweek. He came out to see her last week and was acting very strange. He sat down beside me on the sofa and as he was leaving he turned to me and hugged my neck. I was really shocked...I have only met him twice before. I am married and have no desire for this man...I have decided to have my video camera recording when he comes again this week. I know when I call the office to report his behavior I will have proof as I know he will deny what he has done. Is neck hugging by a professional without my consent considered harassment?

The day this happened..he only spent 5 minutes with the Lady I care for..the rest of the time he was sitting on the sofa

Clearly you are listening to your 'gut-instincts', and they're telling you his behavior is inappropriate. Abuse, or harrassment, is any act which you do not agree with, or tolerate. I would avoid any contact with him, if possible, but think you're very smart by keeping a camera around in case you do cross paths. It is not a crime for you to be somewhat rude to him and with your body language, you may be able to give him the 'hint". Unfortunately, its often times not that easy and he'll probably make another pass at you. At that time, unless you fear him, I would loudly and firmly state your dissatisfaction with his behavior. It would be good if you could bring your husband, or any male friends along, if you KNOW he will be there...Good luck. Be safe and never put yourself in a compromising situation, if you can avoid it. Authorities (law enforcement) needs to be notified IMMEDIATELY, in the event he touches you again...it wont lock him up, but it may jarr him enough to get the point across that you have no desire to have relations, other than a professionally-friendly, purely platonic means...Bragging or boasting about the hubby, your awesome relationship, etc, in front of him may cause him to alter his decisions, and he maybe a gentleman and respect you, as he should do automatically.

Absolutely. There should be NO unwanted touching of any type.

You have to tell him to stop. If you don't let him know that you don't want him to hug you then how will he know.

Being a hospice worker he is quite aware that the person you are caring for isn't going to be alive much longer that's what hospice is, the caring of people who want to die on their own, in their own homes. So what's wrong with him giving you a hug? Why are YOU making an issue out of it?

Yes that is harrasment, and you don't have to tolerate it. Get him on tape, and screw him right up a wall

That guy sounds creepy. Don't be left alone with him, and don't leave the person you care for alone with him either. That is disgusting.

Anything that makes you uncomfortable around another person, grabbing, fondling, dirty jokes, neck hugging, etc ... is considered harassment. I would suggest you tell this man first that you are uncomfortable with him doing this and that you would like for him to stop. Silence can be taken as consent in some matters. If he does not stop after you express your feelings on the matter, then take the necessary measures to report him.

Just tell him to quit. Don't wreck his job over it. Probably mixed signals from him. Guys are bad that way and sometimes don't understand how to come on to a gal. Just let him know and he will leave you alone. If you turn him in and you don't say something to him first. You are one insecure broad.

He has no way of knowing what you feel is appropriate unless you let him know. Tell him that you are married and don't fool around. If he sits next to you on the sofa again, get up. If he continues, report him, but set your limits first. He may have thought you needed a hug, not as a make-out hug, but as a friendly, you're doing a difficult job hug.

Actually, that would be classified as assault by contact since it is a provocative gesture. Harassment has to do with telephone or email that are being received repetitively.

my lady he's crossing the line. warm him else report him
extend arms to maintain distance next time.

How is it harassment? The way you have described the incident does not make me believe it is harassment.

He may e a friendly, touchy, effeminine type of person & does this in a reassuring manner.

You are way over the top if you are considering setting up a video camera. I hope he takes you to task for invasion of his privacy!

So someone, under such circumstances hugs you? Are you considering taking further action - for money?

Either you are extremely naive - or else you have been living under a rock during your adult life!

You need to let Hospice know about this person ASAP!!! Who knows what he may be trying to do to others. ANY kind of touching that is not welcomed is sexual harassment. You should get a tape but your main concern really should be for the safety of the person that you are there to take care of. Good luck.

It is not harassment until after you tell him no. A video is good but if it could be interpreted as consent then it is worthless. In that event, you would be the one getting into trouble because you made the video and showed it without his approval. He might sue you.

Therefore, if you make a video, be certain it is clear to anyone watching that his advances were unwelcome. It need not be much. Just "No" or "I'm a married woman, so don't hug me."

I guess I'm not sure what you mean by a "neck hug".
I wouldn't jump to conclusions about this, some people are just naturally affectionate and don't think anything about it.
Or, perhaps he thought he was comforting you in light of the situation. But since it makes you uncomfortable, I would just simply let him know. You don't have to be mean about it, just be honest. I wouldn't go and call the agency on him unless the problem persists. If you two have to both be there, this could make an already tough situation worse. I think it's best to relax, and not read so much into this so early on.