Gerontological Nurse Ventures
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If you ever found yourself disabled and in a wheelchair which of the following would you do?


Commit suicide, get a nurse or assistant to help you (if you could afford it), or live and be a burden to your spouse of family? I personally would take an overdose as I would never want to burden my family. Your family might love you but that doesn't make caring for someone any easier. If you were in a comma, would you want the plug pulled? I would.

I care more about quality of life than quantity. I would find now fun in sitting around in a chair all day. I know alot of people who are in wheelchairs and they are some grouchy demanding people and I would never want to be like that. As far as coming out of a coma, that might never happen and in the mean time, there is the bill to pay. Medical bills don't disappear and someone has to pay them. I would rather my family take the money and buy a hamburger than waste it on me if I was in a vegetable state.

Personally, I don't mind being in a comma, I'm often inside commas and enjoy them, they're very useful things to have. (Being inside parentheses is also fun if you do it right.)

Now, as for being in a coma, I agree with you, at least if it's likely to be irreversible. Not all comas are. I had a girlfriend once who had an aneurism in her brain, was in a coma for a month, came out of it, and forced herself to rebuild her skills and get back to 100% of her abilities.

Merely being unable to walk would be depressing but it's far from the end of the world. There's still a lot you can do, you just have to use your mind more, and I'm sure your mind is as good as anyone else's. Heck, honey, look at Franklin D. Roosevelt. He was the best president of the 20th Century, and he was in a wheelchair the whole time. Some of the best lawyers I know were in wheelchairs.

I'd do the best I could to continue enjoying life. I'm pretty sure that it is possible to have a good life while needing a wheelchair.

As for the coma, it depends if I could hear what was going on etc. if I was unconscious completely, I wouldn't really be able to care if the plug were pulled or not.

That's a horrible attitude. We just found out my son had brain cancer 3 weeks ago. He is 27. I would hate for him to have that attitude. I would gladly wipe his *** for him again to keep him here with me on this earth. He has a good attitude about surviving too. After the surgery to remove the tumor he has had some speech trouble, and has problems walking. Yesterday he wanted to get out so we took him to the store with us and he used the electric cart. He did perfect and had a good time. I love my family and I know my family loves me and that's what counts. Burden???? You can never be a burden to someone who loves you. A coma. If the person is brain dead I say let them go.

I would still try to do for myself but I know my family would help me as I would help them.I would definately NOT want the plug pulled no matter what.People come out of comas & cures are found.

disabled in a wheelchair? I'd live and make the best of life.
in a coma? I would want them to pull the plug. =\

many people in wheelchairs continue to have a successful life and families of their own and play sport etc ..it would be a big change to overcome the obstacles but we all make the best of our lot in life nothing is worth comitting suicide over

as of now- I'd take suicide. if I have children thats a different story. I will still be a burden but at least I'll be there for them as best I can.
If my family begged me not to kill myself I may reconsider or at least try living as a cripple befre making the ireversible choice to end my life.

Interesting question, if I were confined to a wheelchair with the possiblity of a decent quality of life then I'd learn to deal and do as much for myself as I could. If I were going to be a burden then I'd for sure consider ending things.
I do want not want to be on life support unless there is one hell of a good chance that I will come out of the coma and not be in a vegetative state. I have a DNR in my records.

All of my loved ones know to pull the plug if I can't do it myself. Any missing or useless limbs, brain damage, even horrible facial scarring is enough for me to call it quits--but then, I've been & still am in 24/7 f-ing bad pain, so it won't take much to push me over the edge. I hope your question is hypothetical.

ok first of all just because your in a wheelchair doesnt make you a burden to your family. ALL diabled people would take offense to this. 2nd suicide is never a proper option...the family would be more saddened by this then anything else...third the comma there is always a chance you could come out but I guess it would depend on the how the family felt on that and what we discussed if there was any discussions on what to do if...

All life has value! Only God should decide when life ends. I respect llife.

Actually I would not commit suicide because that is the most selfish thing any human can do. Talk about being a burden! How about the person who loves you that comes in the house to find you dead! Now that is what I call a burden.

Anyways...I would continue living and know that my family and my spouse would not have a problem taking care of me because those are the people in the world that you are supposed to be able to turn to when you need help. If you are married to someone who doesn't want to stay with you because you are in a wheelchair I must say you did not do a very good job of finding someone who loves you. Also, being the way I am I would probably find ways to do things on my own so I would not constatntly need assistance.

I would choose none of your options. I would learn how to live in the wheel chair and go on living life as close to the way i previously had as possible. Being in a wheel chair is not a death sentence. But i do agree with you about the coma. If it was thought that i wasn't going to come out of it and would be a vegetable for the rest of my life i too would want the plug pulled.

Well, its difficult to answer this u know. But i believe that life is something that is given to us by God and he alone has the powers to take it away from us too. Therefore, i surely wouldn't like to commit suicide, but I shall try to live, being a lesser burden on my family. It is not that u are handicapped means all the opportunities in life for u are finished. For eg, I know one of those disabled persons in wheel chairs, who has lost her legs so badly that everybody thought her family could never afford the expenses. But we were dumbstruck to find out that all the expenses were bore by her and her small handicrafts business... There is always a ray hope in the darkest of rooms...... :-)

Hi,
What is " to die " with dignity?

with regards:

if i was disabled in a wheelchair, i would immediately start painitng. since i cant deal with that hobby because of my hectic life:)

If I was confined to a wheel chair I would hate every moment, but
I would love to spend every minute with my family. I would find a way to hire a nurse to give me the help I need. As being in a comma I feel if I knew I was brain damage and I knew I was never
going to recover then Yes I would rather die then suffer and let my
family suffer as well. They do not need to go through hell because of me. Therefore I would rather end my life so no one
would suffer, to me it is only fair and life should go on for every
else and not have to stop on my account. My daughter knows
what to do if anything was to happen to me. It's all about the unplug and cremation. Get it over and done with quick and easy.

I imagined myself in that situation. I will never ever take my life, for it is not ours. I should try to be strong, not be bitter and angry for what happened.

I think you should love yourself more. Try to think of it this way.. be grateful you're only in a wheelchair... not in a dark, lonely casket.

Go ahead.. and live life to the fullest!

Walk with God.

Suicide is not an option because you never know when modern medicine might come up with a cure for your condition.

Nurse or assistant to help is a good idea.

Being a burden? We're all burdens to someone, but a love goes a long way toward making such burdens bearable.

Overdose? No, that's the suicide thing again.

Family might love ... that's the burden thing again.

If I were in a comma ..... do you mean "coma"? I would find it difficult to live in a comma. Very restrictive. Almost as restrictive as living in a coma. However, even in a coma there is a chance of recovery so long as the brain isn't irrevocably damaged so I'd want to hang in there and hope for the best.

Quality of life is different for everyone. What one person can tolerate, another may find intolerable. Living your life in a wheelchair is NOT the end of the world, and doesn't mean that you need someone to care for you for the rest of your life. People in wheelchairs have difficulties Im sure, but there are worse things out there. And if your family or spouse loves you, it wouldnt be a burden.
As far as the coma, if I had no quality of life, no brain activity, and no way of living without machines...I have already told my family to turn them off. Why sustain my life if I will never be out of a hospital bed, or eat or drink on my own, or even communicate? But its a personal choice for everyone.

I think your question shows immaturity, and lack of knowledge, as a nursing sister within the community welfare sector, for past ten years, i too have seen alot.

Did you know that many, disabled and wheelchair bound people live happy successful lives, both dependant and independantly? Many of these people, that i have met in this situation, have become disabled or wheelchair bound for a variety of reasons, some of them car accidents, polio victims, degenerative diseases and the like, and all have willingly accepted their situations and try to live as independantly as possible...also many of them, are generally just happy to still be breathing......its called being grateful for what you do have.

Believe me when i say, just because you have come across a few "grouchy" types, it doesnt mean they are all like that, nor do they all appreciate being labeled as such.

Oh and as for your suicide comment, that is more of a psychological issue than anything, if you choose not to see someone about that, well thats your decision, just as a bit of advice, think before you speak, there are alot of people out here that have lost someone in this way, and would think of your comment as selfish, and are likely to jump on you because of it......try working with these people as a full time job, or perhaps even volunteering with a charity for a few days a week, you might just gain some education and insight into the way many live, you will find many of them far more determined to live a normal "life", than an able bodied person.

If I was to be a vegetable as you say, I too would want the plug pulled. However, if I could afford a nurse (or even if i couldn't afford one) and still had my faculties intact and was only disabled in walking and confined to the wheelchair I'd want to live. I have a lot to offer to family and friends even if in a wheelchair. Easy mobility isn't everything in life. I would focus on the things that I can do and not beat up about those beyond my capabilities.

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