i want to become a nurse, but im scared like it will be way to hard and that i might change my mind. like what am i going to do if i change my mind? im really scared college will be way to hard. im pretty smart, but im so scared of like failing out of college. im also so scared of writing the college essay and getting into a good college. and i dont want my parents to like flip out if i don't get in. ah, im so nervous, why do we have to decide what we want to do with our lives at 17? any help tips or ideas to help my fears? or anything to say? its more im just scared of the workload and changing my mind. Stop worrying. I found HS much harder than college (on many levels).
If you did well in HS, you will do well in college. HS was the absolute worst period of my life. College was the absolute best. Why don't you just go to a Community College colse to home for the first year or two and see if it is for you. That is normal. :) Use that nervous energy for good. Fill out as many applications as you can. Writing a college essay is not as hard as you think. You really just have to write things about yourself like what you are interested in and why you want to become a nurse. You can start out at a community college to get the general studies prerequisites out of the way, then later transfer to a higher institution. It will go easier on your wallet and it will help you to make the transition. Don't be afraid. Just take it one step at a time. Being prepared will ease your fears. Your parents aren't going to be upset. Talk to them about it. They will be ecstatic that you have chosen to further your education and may even be more pleased that you have chosen a community college. Good luck! Change is hard. You have got used to High school and now it is time to move on. Just remember, if you try something and don't like it you are not a failure, you are just showing that you are a mature person who recognises your own abilities. My daughter didn't like a course at high school and took a whole term to decide what to do. She gave it up but then had to have extra coaching for her new subject. She realised that she should have admitted she hated it earlier. Now she is at university she had one class and immediately realised she had made a mistake and changed. She isn't a failure. Don't be afraid, it is always possible to change courses. Try a Community College and live at home if you will feel better. Remember how ever confident they look 75% of people are feeling as worried as you. Most of my life, I had settled by remaining in my comfort zone because I was afraid to fail. My lack of education was one example of the consequences of being ruled by this emotion. The events leading up to finding the courage to overcome this terror were hard lessons in my life. But, I learned through determination and hard work, I had the power to choose whether my fear would hold me back or help me reach my goals.
It was mid December and Christmas was quickly approaching. I had not yet started my holiday shopping because I couldn鈥檛 afford it. I didn鈥檛 have enough money to pay my rent and eat let alone buy presents. What was I going to do? I couldn鈥檛 ask Mom and Dad to bail me out again and there was no way in hell I was moving back home. That left me one option, to get a second job.
A friend of mine had just been hired at a medical laboratory and I thought this would be a good job for me too. The pay was fair and it was a midnight position, so the hours would not interfere with my day job. However, it did involve handling blood and urine specimens, which seemed a bit risky. I desperately needed the money though, so I applied. I started working 3 nights a week by the end of the month and my life as I knew it was over.
The schedule I had to keep was rigorous. I tried to space out my nights at the lab but many days I worked double shifts back to back. It was common for me to work in the pharmacy from 1pm to 9pm , run home, change cloths, and work at the lab from 10pm to 7am. Other days I would get home from the lab at 7am just to turn around and work at the pharmacy from 8am to 4pm. I was always exhausted so whenever I was not working, I was sleeping. I now had the money to pay my bills and some spending cash but no time or energy to spend it. I began to feel like I didn鈥檛 have a home or a life. My apartment was a hotel, a place to sleep and shower. My jobs became my life. I had no time for friends, family of myself. Even though I was not happy to say the least, I could not afford to quit. This continued for several months and by July, I decided something had to change.
I finally understood why getting an education was so important. Without a degree, I could not advance in either job and without a promotion, neither one paid enough. Did I want to live like this for the rest of my life, struggling to just keep my nose above the water line? I would have to go back to school if I wanted to be able to afford what I considered comfortable living. Since I had been working in a pharmacy, I knew I wanted to be a pharmacist and that meant 6 years of school.
I had thought about returning to school many times but my fear of failure had kept me away for nearly 10 years. You see, high school was easy for me and I never learned to study. So when I went to a community college after graduating, I quit after only one semester. My excuse, it was too much like high school since I was still living with my parents. In truth, I was struggling and too lazy to put forth the effort. Next, I decided I would go away to school and was accepted at a 4 year university across the state. So the following fall, I packed my bags and went. This is where I learned how to shoot pool and play drinking games. As a result, I had to pack my bags again in the spring. I told most people it was because I didn鈥檛 have the money to stay but one look at my grade point average and the real reason was vary clear. Now I had failed twice in my attempts at school. Did I want to try again? After all isn鈥檛 it three strikes and you鈥檙e out?
I chose to bite the bullet and applied to a local 4 year university for the fall 鈥?9. I researched what courses were required to apply to pharmacy school and found an apartment within walking distance to the school. I also applied for financial aid, accepting the fact that I鈥檒l be $70,000 in debt by the time I finished. Moreover, I set my standards much higher than ever before. This time I was determined to succeed. I had even begun to select the classes I wanted to take first when I was blind-sided by reality.
My application for admission to the local university was denied based on my grade point average. How could this happen? I was not the same person who earned that grade point 10 years ago. They couldn鈥檛 hold this against me, could they? I thought of myself as a non-traditional student and it never occurred to me that I would be rejected. After pleading with the admissions office, I was so discouraged that I hibernated for an entire weekend and almost gave up.
Feeling depressed and sorry for myself, I went through the motions for the next few weeks, work, sleep, work, sleep. Then on my 29th birthday, I decided the pity party was over. I wanted an education and dammit, I was going to get one. I began looking at alternative options and since I had already signed a lease for an apartment near the local university, I settled on a community college in the area. Unknown to me at the time, this was the best decision I had made thus far.
School became my number one priority. In the fall, I quit my job at the lab and dropped to part-time at the pharmacy so I would have more time to devote to my studies. I took out student loans and moved into a tiny apartment in the student ghetto to cut expenses. I didn鈥檛 miss class unless it is absolutely unavoidable and homework came before pool or drinking games. I was neither apprehensive about asking questions for fear of feeling stupid nor too proud to accept help from family and friends. After 2 years at the community college, I transferred to a university and earned my Doctor of Pharmacy.
It took me many years to find the courage to return to school, but in the process I have learned many things. Education really is the key to success and it is not easily obtained. It must be earned through hard work and the effort you make today will have an impact on your future. Most importantly though, do not let fear keep you from striving for your goals but use it as motivation to help you achieve them.
This is my story. I hope it gives you insight to the decision you have to make today. Good Luck! |
